Nonnegotiable Growth
We, as human beings, are designed to evolve, change, and grow. Otherwise, we perish! That's what some people call, die on life. Life is not about finding your purpose is about creating your purpose throughout your life.
Dying in life can be manifested in different ways, earning weight, losing focus, money, and health. I will dare to say that we frequently lose what we could have under control. Maybe you are thinking… but these situations are part of life, and you are right, the problem resides in keeping yourself stuck on them.
Let’s dive into “personal growth” as it is defined; is the improvement of our skills, knowledge, wisdom, habits, behavior, and personal qualities. Personal development allows us to reach our full potential, be our best selves, and live our happiest, most successful lives. But when we read those lines, can become stressful thinking about how many things we must learn and change, right? But, it's not about learning itself; it's about applying whatever you learn so it becomes part of who you are.
Personal growth is about overcoming our natural tendency to respond quickly or negatively to situations.
"We must become the change we want to see." Mahatma Gandhi
I used to teach my daughter this; Your abilities: what is easy for you to do. Your preferences: what you really enjoy doing. Your obligations: what you must, and the feelings you have in between, are reflected in your will.
How as a leader is your will in your entrepreneurial lifestyle, and personal growth involved?
Let's go to investigate. Which one will you do first; what do you enjoy doing or what is easy for you to do? In my experience, people tend to do what is easier for them to do, then what they enjoy, and finally what they must. But when life takes you on a complicated path the scenario changes, you do first what you must, then what is easier for you to do, and finally, and this becomes optional, what you enjoy, this is the survival state. Yes! In the survival state I am talking about, the thing must be done, or you die, in which I am an expert, here the growth is on high standards and non-negotiable.
But, if this works in a survival state, what about in a motivation state? Growth is not an obligation is a motivation. Let’s go back to those feelings that are reflected in your will. When you do what you enjoy doesn’t matter if it works or not, finally the objective is reached, joy! When you do what is easier for you to do, something similar happens, maybe you don’t enjoy it, but you reach the target as well.
But think about doing something that you don’t enjoy and is not easy for you to do, what are your feelings? In this scenario, I could see my daughter's face, when it was her turn to cook, as you can imagine she didn’t enjoy cooking, but she loves good food. As she didn’t enjoy it, she convinced herself that cooking was complicated and was not easy for her to do, and then it became complicated for her to learn how to cook. However, she could perfectly follow a recipe having as a result a delicious meal. A meal that she could hardly replicate without that recipe. If you are in a survival state you don’t stop to think about joy or ease, you do it! So, you learn, then becomes easy, and finally, you enjoy it. Here is where your will is totally involved.
“Lose your mind and come to your senses.” Fritz Perls
How helpful can be to learn how to cook? In my daughter's case, when she denied herself to learning how to cook, she was not refusing the possibility to enjoy a delicious meal only, she was refusing herself to grow! How? Cooking can help you to develop your hearing, sight, touch, and mainly your smell and taste senses, which we commonly use, in autopilot. How important can be developing your senses?
“All our knowledge begins with our senses, proceeds then to understanding, and ends with reason.” Immanuel Kant
Yes! You got it! It is about doing what you don’t enjoy and what is not easy for you to do, this is what makes you grow thoroughly, and that opens a range of possibilities. Growing from pain? Is that necessary? Yes! But only if you want to see it that way, otherwise is as simple as becoming diligent in developing your indomitable iron will, awakening your curiosity to learn, what will drive true transformation, and if you make it non-negotiable with the expectation of excellence, it won't be painful. Good news! Believe me, in the end, it will become part of who you are, it will become easy, and you will enjoy it! The result: You have growth! That simple!
“Equipped with his five senses, man explores the universe around him and calls the adventure, science.” Edwin Powell Hubble
Allow me to share another example, when I was around ten years old, I had to decide whether it was easy or not for me to learn how to drive. I wasn’t interested in it at all. I wasn’t even as tall as to reach the car pedals and see the road at the same time. But it was a matter of need. As my father had to make the three shifts at the factory, and there was a need to transport my mother, who was quadriplegic due to a road accident, from my hometown to Mexico City, then inevitably I was selected to perform that task. My father didn’t ask me if I was interested in learning how to drive, or if I feared it, it was a fact! The good thing was that he didn’t show a drop of doubt about my ability to do it, so he transmitted that confidence to me. My father made very smart adaptations to the car, so I could be able to reach the pedals and lever and look at the road at the same time. Those adaptations were so perfect that when he needed it, he could change it easily. Inside, the car looked like a transformer robot practically.
However, whenever the driving lesson was close to happening for some reason, I was feeling sick, something in my body wasn’t working well, as I wanted to play with my friends instead of taking driving lessons. I was having annoying thoughts, which were not the best way to start a lesson. My father made me notice that that lesson was nonnegotiable for me, so I decided to take it as another task I must perform to contribute to my home. Then I will dare to say that I almost became a Formula One driver at the age of eleven years. And today I do enjoy driving, taking a country road full of very tight bends with the highest speed permitted. This developed ability allowed me to enjoy one of my dreams; My daughter was at high school almost one hour away from Chicago and I was visiting a dear friend in Chicago downtown. He has a very beautiful convertible BMW with a non-automatic transmission that was parked between many other cars in his building´s garage. It was very cold outside then he told me, if you can take the car out of there, you can use it to pick up your daughter from school. As it was a tough mission the guys of the valet parking started to make bets. Well, allow me to say that; It was a pleasure to drive that car on Lake Shore Drive! Senses involved, sight, hearing, and touch.
Why do leaders make their growth nonnegotiable?
Progress is what creates happiness and not only for your entrepreneurial lifestyle.
I firmly believe that any ability can be developed, you progress when you develop new abilities, and to do so, you must learn how to master your internal world, this starts with your self-knowledge and self-understanding. At The School of Your Pass for a Better You we offer a class where you can learn about YOU, why you do what you do, why you don’t do it, and how to change it.
Every new knowledge is good, and anything that you can learn can be helpful but, above all, anything you learn makes you grow if you make your growth nonnegotiable. Eventually, you won't have to think about learning, as it will be your senses' daily delight.
“The executive who keeps on doing what he has done successfully before… is almost bound to fail” Peter Drucker
In my experience is usually easier to find what we dislike than what we like, let's use that in our favor, performing what we dislike works on our weaknesses. Remember! is about personal growth not about sales.
As a leader your growth will make you Resourceful and becoming Resourceful will make you grow! All who we are is interconnected. Being a specialist in something doesn’t mean you can stop growing. Learn at multiple levels and don’t get into the trap of “trivialities”, learning how to cook and how to drive is a very meaningful starting point to train your senses, what about learning, the marketing, or the production language if you are a sales manager, or vice versa? Keep learning beyond your current role or roles in personal and professional life. Here, your growth can become exponential!
Which of your senses are you willing to develop? How would you like to start? How could this make a great outcome for you? What is the most important thing for you to learn next? I would love to know about your experiences, you can use the comments below.
I will share on my podcast “Your Pass for a Better You” which is coming soon, how a cartoon movie can teach a meaningful lesson that can save you from having trouble. This happened with my dearest friend's BMW car that same day. He doesn’t know about it, but he will know if he listens to this episode.
If you are interested in reading more about Entrepreneurial Life Insights, you can visit my blog “The Alpha Blog”.
The School of Your Pass for a Better You is currently closed for enrollment, but you can enter your information HERE or share our link with a friend, to get on the waitlist and be notified when doors open again.
See you in the arena
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